Archive for February, 2013

It is about a week before I am due to go on a snowboarding trip with a church group. I am not looking forward to it one bit.

As the trip has been approaching I have seemed to slip into a deep depression & all I see is the negative.

It is my fault that we are going on this trip, but I have this terrible habit of not thinking things through. Instead of thinking “How do Christians make me feel?” I have just agreed to attend the trip & now I am stressing about how I am going to fit into this group of Christian people.

I am the opposite of a “good Christian” as I live in “sin” with my boyfriend, but I wouldn’t change my life now. I used to be so focused on being the perfect Christian, but it was the church that made me realise that being a Christian wasn’t the best option for me as an introverted person.

I have never had any Christian friends, even when I was a budding Christian. So this trip is going to be very interesting!

I have been living in “sin” for 6 years now & we have been told that we are not allowed to share a room on the trip, so we have been forced to share a room with people of the same sex.
I find this quite interesting… It made me wonder…

How does the church deal with people struggling with their sexuality?

If someone who was a Christian was struggling with their sexuality & decided to go on a trip like this would they force them to share with someone of the same sex because males & females are not allowed to share a room.

I find the Church to be so archaic, they don’t seem to focus on the times that we are living in. They are so busy trying to control, that they are missing the point of life.
I feel I have learnt that the hard way.
I have missed the opportunity to make real loving friendships because I have been trying so hard to avoid being corrupted by the world, but it is the church that is corrupted. I doubt this is what God envisioned for His church when he sent Jesus to die for us.

We have free will to chose how we will follow God’s word, but I find the church seems to constantly enforce their rules, which takes free will away from the people they are supposed to be teaching. If a Christian doesn’t live right by what a church believes the bible to say, that is the individuals problem & they must take it up with God on judgement day.

As Christians we should not be telling people how to live as “who are we to judge”!

My boyfriend who is not a Christian got upset with me last night because I was stressing about how judged I felt by the church & he said “this is what I hate about organised religion, it makes people feel shit about themselves!” This is a true statement.

A friend of mine has just become a grandmother & I am one of the very few people she trusted telling, because her daughter isn’t married & she is so worried about how the church will judge her & her daughter.

So where is this LOVE that church is supposed to show? I know more people who are Christians that feel pressure to be perfect, than those who are just trying to become better.

Jesus was the saviour of sinners not the perfect!

We should be saving as Christians not destroying. The church is so concerned by the majority of people who are leaving the church & they never seem to look at what is wrong with the church, but what is wrong with society & the types of people who are leaving the church.

People should want to be a Christian, not feel that they are not perfect enough to be a Christian!


Can we love more than one person?
I am “in love”, but sometimes I wonder if my life had taken a different turn & I hadn’t met my current boyfriend & fallen in love, would I have had another opportunity?

With the types of shows on TV about polygamy & usually it’s men who are in a polygamist relationship, but is it possible to be in love with more than one person in one’s life.

I know finding someone other than your partner attractive is possible, but that is a natural occurrence as there are many good-looking people in the world. Love is deeper than that.

This month (February) is pretty much dedicated to love. We have a dedicated day to let people know how we feel, but you can love your family, friends & then the love changes, & includes you partner, regardless of whether you are heterosexual, homosexual or transsexual, whatever your preference.

In Biblical terms there are four types of Love:

Agape — unconditional love, God for mankind
Philia — brotherly love, or love that exists between close friends.
Storge — Love that grows between family members.
(Only these three are mentioned in the Bible Eros has no mention at all.)
Eros; A special intimate love between just two people for life; not to be shared or thrown about as is the trend today.

The fact that Eros Love isn’t in the bible says that this pressure that Christians put on themselves to be married, could possible be forcing themselves into a marriage that wasn’t going to last.
When you find the person that Eros is aimed at, nothing can possibly come between you & you wouldn’t want to let anything jeopardise that.

Despite these explanations of love, it just shows that love can be spread between many.
Not that i’m saying this is an answer to the question, but it shows that there are many levels that can be created from the word love.

Love is much more complex an emotion, feeling and action than we will ever truly show to one another.
We seem to only ever express one or two of these terms of love in our entire life. So in terms of the four types of love mentioned before, YES we can love more than one person! 😉