Snow Trip (day 6) March 2013

Posted: March 9, 2013 in Uncategorized

Today is the last day of this trip & we finally get to hear about the charity this trip was designed for.

Despite having drank so much the night before I woke very early & took the time to just have alone time to finish my previous day blog & start today’s.

This has been the worst experience of Christian community, when I was younger I was not given the opportunity to attend Bible camp, but I wanted to. This is the first time being away with Christians & this is probably the worst situation as my faith is so fragile. Also my boyfriend isn’t even a Christian, so it’s even worse for him!

Yesterday, my boyfriend told me that we should never attend this church AGAIN! He is right, this is the wrong place to grow in a fragile faith. I used to love being a Christian, it was my world. I would walk the street praying to God, listen to Christian bands (not necessarily gospel), but since trying to make friends in the church I found it so hard to love God more so his people.

Friends I made outside of the church were what I wanted from Christian friends, but I never made a friend in the church. My face just don’t fit!

The church is like a club that has a strict code that all the leaders & their wives decide who can join. During this trip I have felt that they have been trying to test my relationship & I think it’s because we are not married. Like 6 years means nothing!

This church is very focused on singledom & how to become a couple, being single is like having something wrong with you. But… Then they treat me as though I have stole a guy from one of their friends, by spreading my legs.

This trip was in aid of discovering more about the A21 Campaign, but I am not encouraged to put money into their campaign as they don’t seem to have women’s best interests at heart, especially if they are so quick to reject women in their community.

I am looking forward to hearing about what they are trying to achieve to hopefully see a different side to this church community, but it will be a struggle. They are so quick to ask for your money without any information about how they are saving these lives.

Back in January, I attended a charity even for Many Hopes & they explained their action plan, what the money was to be used for & how they plan to save the lives out in Africa. It encouraged me to give, because I could see the work that was being done & how they plan to give people back their lives.

There are quite a few charities aimed at abolishing trafficking, I know, but I only focused on this one because I have access to how the plan to achieve their goals & visit their offices, hence why I am here on this trip.

When the restaurant opened for breakfast, my boyfriend & I decided to eat alone, when we left, we sat in the lobby for a hot drink. My roommate left the restaurant, despite I hadn’t even seen her go in. She was angry & before long she was in tears, Skeletor & her horde of bitches continued their reign of bullying by ignoring her as she greeted them.

If burns me up inside when I hear a victim of bullying blame themselves or think they are not a good person because they are angry at being bullied. These are the worst kind of Christians, from day 1 of this trip they have been ostracising people. I thought that Christianity was about community, but I don’t see that among these people. The devil comes to test us & I see Satan in all those who are breaking the spirit of the only Christians that I have net here who are promoting the community & love that Jesus preached.

So the time finally came & we all ascended the coach to Sofia, not to the airport, but for the longest day with my oppressors. Due to waiting for people we were in the last group to get to the coach & it was the most terrifying moments as I saw numerous seats empty, but none together. I refused to sit alone, but as I neared the back of the bus, it was like a triumphant tune played as we got our seats…together.

The journey was long & I could feel the tension around me, the whole 1 hour journey my mind wouldn’t stop playing scenarios of what I could have done to upset or offend. I couldn’t think of anything.

Finally, we arrive in Sofia it was a warm day. We went to the office of the A21 Campaign for a talk about what they do & how they do it. It was interesting, but I really wish they were more approachable because I would have liked to ask more, but I really didn’t want to stir up anymore ill feelings towards me.

After the talk the took us on a tour of Sofia. It wasn’t what I was expecting, I thought they would give us an insight into how trafficking happens in Bulgaria & the places which are rife. It was still amazing wandering around, but they took us to a “dodgy” part of the city & we were told to clutch our bags. I thought the pickpockets would be subtle, but they were children & they just walked over smiling & laughing trying to get us to drop our guard.
So many of the Christians were smitten by the children, but I am no fool!
They children would point out to one another which bags they wanted & who they thought were vulnerable. I was so happy when we finally moved on!

After the tour we went to a restaurant for traditional Bulgarian food. It was a great idea, as the salad was like a starter & sat on the table for us to dig into at our leisure. They after the salad was done the meat & potatoes were placed on the table.
We paid 15lv for this meal, which they upped the price from 10lv. My boyfriend thinks they just wanted to make a bit extra as it was definitely a 15lv meal & I’m inclined to believe him. This was a high price as in Borovets the meals were a lot less & apparently as it was a ski resort location the prices were higher, so in Sofia our meal should have been cheaper!

After dinner, tension had not seized & we were heading back to the bus, but this time heading the place I have been looking forward to since the ostracising began… the AIRPORT!
The check-in line was so long & all I wanted to do was get on the plane & back to my existence of all Christians are good people, instead of being surrounded by the most evil ofmChristians I have EVER met!

As we checked in my boyfriend & I asked if we could possibly be seated together, I could not have handled being sat with Skeletor or her clique of bitches, BUT maybe God is watching out for me because by the luck of the easy jet draw we were together.

I am back in London & I could not be happier, I have decided that Hillsong & it 25+ community (Velocity) is just not for me. I may be a half-hearted Christian at the moment, but I do long to get the old me back, the girl of passion & direction in her walk with God. Hillsong is not the place for that to happen, I felt NO God on this trip & definitely saw very few Christians!


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